Do You Belong Or Fit In?

When I first saw that image, it stopped me in my tracks. In my corporate career, I have been that tangerine, trying hard to fit in! Hiding parts of myself in order to be accepted, not sharing my truth, even changing the way I speak for fear of not belonging.

In other words, are we sacrificing authenticity for belonging?

As I was reading more about belonging, I came across a Deloitte study which showed that 61% of people in the workplace cover an aspect of who they are. While this might be a successful short-term tactic, it is definitely not sustainable and certainly detrimental to performance, engagement and satisfaction.

Belonging is a deeply ingrained need. For our ancestors, being ostracised meant almost certain death. And while our lives are certainly not in danger, if we feel we don't belong in our workplaces, our job satisfaction, engagement and happiness are all negatively impacted. Just because you fit in, doesn't mean you belong.

Brené Brown talks about this very eloquently: “Fitting in is about assessing a situation and becoming who you need to be to be accepted. Belonging, on the other hand, doesn’t require us to change who we are; it requires us to be who we are.”

So as a leader, are you creating a culture of belonging or fitting in? Do you know what to look for in your company and people, to tell the difference?